I recently went back and binge watched all six seasons and one feature film {just the first one, the second one is no bueno} of Sex and the City.  I miss these ladies.  When the show first came out, I was single in the city of Los Angeles.  I dreamed of having Carrie’s wardrobe and her shoes, but more importantly, I wanted her social life.  I did have a good one, and amazing friends, but there was room for improvement.  By season two, I had a boyfriend and was working my way to the city of New York.

Still dreaming of her wardrobe and shoes, my social life took a hit.  A boyfriend can do that to your social life.  The boyfriend became my husband, the show became my escape.  The show ended, the husband became my ex-husband, and Charlotte, Miranda, Carrie and Samantha lived on in my memory.

Until dating happened.  Sometimes while I sit swiping left or right, hitting “Like” or “Pass” and responding to “He Likes You,” I often wonder what Carrie Bradshaw would do in today’s modern world of dating?  Then I started reading some of her essays in Candace Bushnell’s Sex and the City book and I realized, she would think the same thing she was thinking then; dating is dating.   And dating is hard.

Dating Apps

Carrie’s thing was her social life.  She loved going out and meeting people.  That’s how she got the majority of her dates.  It’s how she met Mr. Big, and Berger, and Aiden.  Well, technically she met Aiden after seeing his photo in the newspaper and placing herself at an event he was at, so maybe that meeting was like using a dating app.  Speaking of, what would she think of so much texting, and dating apps?

I assume she would think they suck.  Meeting people this way isn’t organic, and she liked authenticity.  I do, too.  As far as texting, Carrie required a phone call.  I admit, I’m a texter, but eventually I like to know if you give good phone.  I have learned my lesson on this one.  It’s a phone, it’s in your pocket, so use it for it’s original purpose.

Ghosted, Submarined, Freckling or Cuffing

Getting ghosted is nothing new, the only thing that’s changed is that now it has a hip name.  You could be chatting with someone and all of a sudden, they stop responding.  Or you could be full on dating someone and all of a sudden they stop responding.  Sometimes it’s welcome.  Other times it hurts.  Carried referred to it as the “End of Love in Manhattan.”  I imagine she would pull on her skirt, put on a fabulous pair of shoes, and get on with her life.

Being submarined means first you’ve been ghosted, usually for a significant amount of time.  And then all of a sudden, they return as if nothing happened.  I picture Carrie thinking of this as leaving town; heading to the Hamptons for the summer, maybe.  You leave town for a little while, only to decide it wasn’t so bad after all.  Then you return, all in the hopes that your apartment is still standing.  She would call bullshit on this move and tell you to permanently leave this town because it/he is as bad as you originally thought.

Freckling is being coupled up, but only for the summer.  Kind of like your summer freckles that start to fade in the fall and winter.  Carrie would call this what it used to be called, which was a May-December romance.  Or maybe it was 9 ½ weeks?  Either way, she would say go for it, but don’t get too attached.  Even better if he has a place to stay in the Hamptons.

If you do get too attached, it’s okay because cuffing season is close behind freckling.  While it sounds like something Christian Gray might be into, it’s actually another hip dating term.  While you get freckled in the summer, you get cuffed in the fall, meaning you stay home and cuddle under blankets during the cooler months.  Netflix and chill.  Carrie would not be a fan of this one.  She would say, if he won’t take you out in public, don’t date him at all.

At the end of it all, when I was done binge watching, the rose-colored glasses had come off a bit. My love affair with Carrie Bradshaw had taken a hit.  I realized Carrie could be whiny, and sometimes she started fights just to start fights.  And she talked in circles a lot.  I just wanted to say, “okay we get it, enough!”  But she was a true romantic and she knew what she wanted.  And if she wanted to wait 6 years for her commitment phobe to commit to her, then shoes off to her! As for me, I’m on sabbatical, because right now, all I want to do is run away.

PS – For fun, take the quiz – Which Sex and the City Character Are You?

{I have taken a similar quiz before, like around Y2K.  I got Miranda and I always thought it was an injustice.  Today, I got Carrie.  Justification after all these years.  Or is it?  I just called her out for being whiny and an instigator… Ugh, not only is dating hard, but so are Buzzfeed quizzes…}