My name is Terri and I’m addicted to reality.  Guest post today from my dear friend, Louella, I mean, Terri.  The amount of useless knowledge the two of us have floating around in our heads is dangerous.  Really dangerous!  Here she shares just a small amount of her reality TV knowledge.  Enjoy!

My obsession with reality TV began in the 90s with Real World Los Angeles.  In 1994, a sorority sister and I attended the MTV Music Awards and I walked right up to Aaron to tell him that he was my favorite.  Ugh.  I remember Glen was standing right next to him (this was before he made his official debut), and he gave poor Aaron a hard time about my gushing remarks.

Several years later I worked with Heather, who was actually dating Aaron back in the day and appeared on a few episodes.  She went on to marry Shaggy {Matthew Lillard} and Aaron is now the Vice President International at Skullcandy Inc. – or so I’ve heard.

Fast forward 19 years…Ugh.  Here I am still watching reality TV.  This totally qualifies me as somewhat of any expert or aficionado.  My husband is mortified by my viewing habits and is worried that our kids are losing brain cells at a rapid pace.  I do my best to keep said viewing habits to myself, but I know I’m not alone.

I know many of you reading this are reality TV junkies, too.  The only difference is that I’m admitting it out loud (with my fingers crossed that my husband doesn’t read this post)!

OK, so here’s the deal.  Last week, I was flipping channels and stopped at the season premiere of Duck Dynasty. Uh-mazing.  I think the family must somehow be related to that little hot mess Honey Boo Boo.  I could barely understand a word they were saying but it was obvious they are close-knit kin.  The wives all looked and acted pretty normal.  I’m thinking there’s a Real Housewives of whatever- southern-state-they-hail-from in their future.

Speaking of Real Housewives…I’m so glad RHOA is O-V-E-R.  Shouldn’t you actually have to be a housewife to be on the show?  Yes, Miss America…I’m talking to you Kenya (you RHOA fans will get it.)  And, Gretchen.  Seriously? (I’ve now switched to the RHOC.)

Take Slick Smiley and go away.  Far, far away.  (Side note: in February I introduced my son to the mom of one of my BFF’s.  He looked at her then turned to me and asked if she was on the RHOBH.  Unfortunately, he asked this right in front of my husband. Ugh.)

From wives to Teens….Farrah.  Farrah, Farrah, Farrah.  You’re like Britney circa 2007.  Except without any talent.  Wait.  Never mind.  Go away…with Gretchen.  Janelle you’re like Amanda Bynes…or vice versa.  Leah, you do know that Jeremy is Corey’s doppelganger right?  (BTW, Corey, chew is not attractive or cool.  Seriously.  Also, throw away that damn baseball cap – you know the one.)  You could use styling tips from Rachel Zoe.

Rachel Zoe…I literally LOVE her.  She is literally major.  BUT, Rog.  What’s up with your hair?  It’s not good.  It’s literally terrible.  Cut it.  Literally.  On a somewhat related note, my heart literally broke when Rach and Brad severed ties, but then I literally rejoiced when he got his own world.  Love him (sorry Rach.)

Now that those two shows have ended, I am so excited for MDLNY.  I am bummed that Michael and his Botox armpits are not returning.  And as much as I can’t wait to see Ryan and Fredrik, MDLLA is my fave.  Mason is a fellow Wave alumni.

Speaking of real estate (you all know I’m speaking about real estate right?), Mason should hire Jeff and company to stage some of his listings.  Jeff makes me happy.  He reminds me of someone I know in real life, but I can never tell you who because that person might be totally offended.  Actually come to think of it, JEFF might be totally offended.  My other reality fave, LC just bought one of Jeff’s former houses.

Any who, I took a break from watching the Queen of Versailles {now, to some of you, this might sound like a highly sophisticated documentary.  To the rest of you, y’all know better!

Note to Andy C. – I think you should put me on staff….this is like a giant love letter to BRAVO} to write this post for my dear friend who I affectionately call Hedda.  I owe Hedda this favor because she got me to LA back in February to work the red carpet at little awards show that the Academy throws.

Know the best part of the trip?  I took a picture with Stassi – who was literally our server, and Peter who was really managing at SUR.  Jax was behind the bar but I wasn’t brave enough to approach.  And people say that reality TV is fake!

(Thanks for letting me guest blog, Hedda. Love always, Louella)